Still Lingering

I have had a bit of an hiatus in service here, and between my last two posts I see that there was an eight day break. Interestingly I do still get visitors to the blog even when I don't have any nice up to date posts, indeed that is when I get some of my older posts being inspected.   Blogger gives me a bit of a breakdown and over that week my most popular post was one from quite a while back, all the way back to July 2013.    I think it must be something to do with the title of that particular post and the Google searches that some people do. That particular post can be seen here! I'm not sure that it was my finest moment, but who am I to judge!

Co-incidentally this last week or so my favorite cartoonist has been running a series on my favorite strip.   He has had my favorite character working on what would be my favorite job (in my dreams).

However this did make me think, what actually is the difference between lingerie and underwear;- I have some pants that are simply pants, but if I wear them with a matching bra they magically transform into lingerie, so is it the material? the intent? or maybe the marketing?

Certainly some brands have more allure than others, just the names Janet Reager, Agent Provocateur or Figleaves just sound so much more alluring than Marks & Spencer or Matalan. I suspect that this is definitely a case of less is more, i.e. the more you pay the less you get!

I certainly know that most women I know prefer bras that are not underwired, I am now beginning to understand why, yet whenever I go into lingerie departments the vast majority of bras are underwired, so they are not being made primarily for the comfort of the woman.   I suspect that this is a subject I will be revisiting, certainly my perspective on the such things has changed over the last few years, yet I am still very much of the opinion that life is too short for ugly underwear!

My Favorite Cartoonist Brooke McEldowney
My Favorite Strip 9 Chickweed Lane

And the title is a reference to my post of the 18th November 2012, ironically the dress I was lusting over so much at that time I would now have several opportunities to wear, but it is no longer available ~ heyho!

Boobage

In my last post I made a passing comment about wanting to put on a bra.   A couple of my female friends have challenged me on this, as so often by the end of the day they are quite eager to take theirs off.   I can understand this, they are not always the most comfortable of garments, although I do suspect that the better the quality and the better the fit the easier they are to wear.    However my comment had nothing to do with all this.

What I was trying to suggest, in a lighthearted sort of way, was that having had to dress as a man for a while I just wanted to get back to what is my new normal.   Many of my workaday clothes I am wearing at the moment are either he self same ones I was wearing last year, or pretty similar.  Jeans, tee shirt or singlet with a work shirt over the top.   On my feet extremely unsexy and essentially unisex steel te capped work boots.   The difference is the bra.   My boobage (is that word? if not it is now!) is the source of much of my physical expression of my femininity, and by the very nature of how I achieve that little trick I need a bra.

I have heard it said that woman can feel their whole femininity challenged after undergoing mastectomy, this is one of the reasons that reconstructive surgery is offered on the NHS, I suspect that all trans women can relate to this.   It is not our clothes that make us women, it is how we feel inside, but the clothes and our whole external presentation is a large part of how we express it.

On a different note (probably an F) I have a real treat in store for you all tomorrow. A first for Paula's Place, and one I am quite excited about.

Holiday ~ Looking Forward 3

Until very recently I had never understood the concept of buying new clothes to take on holiday, I always had plenty of clothes, threw a few of them into a case and that was it.   Indeed back in my days of motorcycle touring I would save up my oldest and most tatty clothes to take on holiday and through them away as I went along rather than bring them home to wash.   Certainly I would consider the potential weather and my personal comfort, but that was about it, and I would plan what I was going to take in advance, usually about 24 hours in advance.

This time it is a bit different, a couple of pairs of jeans, seven tee shirts and seven pairs of underpants is clearly not going to do, and I have been planning my wardrobe since I booked the trip.   I have now bought myself a swimsuit, a black one piece, looking at myself in the mirror trying it on I felt that if I was going to be sunbathing wearing it I would need some suitable jewelry, so bought some big blingy earrings.  I hope I have solved the problem of "security" in a bathing suit, at least for the top half with the purchase of some Hollister Medical glue, that should keep everything in place and for the lower half I will just have to be careful.  Thinking that it may be hot I also bought myself a couple of "comfort" bras.

Comfort is the name now given to bras that are not underwired, padded, balcony  or overtly fancy, in other words what used to simply be called bras.   Every woman I have ever discussed the matter with has always expressed a preference for bras that are not underwired, yet wherever I look at bras for sale there always seems to be a majority of something around 80% in favour underwired.   This makes me wonder who is buying and wearing all of these underwired bras, maybe there are more of us out there than even I thought.

Purge

I think most of us who are transgendered, transsexual, cross-dresser, transvestite or whatever else we might choice to call ourselves have experienced the purge.   In my experience this consists of a moment of rejection of what we do, brought on by consideration for others, pressures of society, or a moment of self awareness, whatever the cause the result is the same.

We go through all our "stuff" and throw away all our clothes, wigs, jewellery etc. etc. everything that is connected to our cross-dressing.   We are relieved, we have broken the cycle we  will just live a normal male life from now on (I assume that it is the same for female t male as well).   We will initially feel liberated, then we will manage, then we will struggle, then eventually we will give in to the inevitable and buy those cute shoes, or that pair of lacy panties.   Those of us of a "certain age" will recognise that this in itself is part of the cycle we go through.   I know I have been through it many time, too many times, before accepting that this is something I am and not something I do, That the clothes are an essential expression of who I am not the end in themselves.

Through these purges I have lost many garments and items that I now regret, of course it also means that I got rid of some unfortunate purchases that I was never going to wear in public.   Because of the sense of loss attached to a purge in my latest clear out I decided not to dispose of the rejects.   All my "boy" underwear has now been packed up in a suitcase along with my bike leathers and now reside in the attack.

Moving Paula in meant everything in the same place and properly organised, this led to the revelation of exactly how much underwear I have.   Because of the restrictions on doing laundry I think I often bought new when in normal circumstances I would simply have washed, I now find I have far, far too many pairs of panties, bras and tights.   At least it does mean I won't need to buy any for quite some time now, I shall now limit myself to replacing worn out items ~ unless of course they are really cute .

Don't forget that I still need your help and advise as to which dress to wear next Sunday.

Way to go Sven

I don't want to go into the story arc too much, service to say that Sven has been sent by by his employer / girlfriend, the vet, to get her a change of clothes while she wrestles with a cow.   Her underwear causes him a level of confusion not many of us would suffer

 

Lilac and Lace lingerie

As a girl I always try to co-ordinate what I wear, my preference is for dresses so that makes it a bit easier.   But I do like to have matching (or at least co-ordinating) shoes and handbag, my hose should blend with my dress, if I a wearing one my blouse should go with the skirt (or trousers) and jacket.   All this is obvious, but like most girls I go a bit further I like my underwear to co-ordinate as well.  

I have a couple of sets of matching lingerie and d not wear any of the items "solo" they are only ever worn as sets.   But more than that I like to co-ordinate my underwear with my outerwear, so if I a wearing a black or grey dress I will wear a black slip and black panties and bra.   Yesterday I had on a lilac turtle neck sweater and jeans, so my choice of underwear was lilac panties (with white lace trim) to match and white bra.  

Lingerie is, or at very least should be fun, a little frivolous.   The material should be satin or light and filmy, it should be trimmed with lace and bows and even a bit of sparkies. I am sure that for many this is a part of the attraction of cross dressing.   Maybe it is because I a only a part time girl, but to me this is part of getting dressed, part of the fun.

As a boy I wear whatever is on the top of the pile

I'm a good girl I am

Well it's Friday evening, I've had a bit of a funny old day, a mix of fun, work, curious conversation a bit of self satisfaction.

My schedule was to spend the day working with S we had a clearance to do first thing, then after lunch we would go and do some of our regular maintenance work.   About two hours into the working day the rain started, and then just got worse and worse, so after three hours we called it a day and "went back to the ranch".   While sitting around, having lunch and chatting we got onto the subject of bras ~ as you do ~ and underwear in general, for example why is it that in the Matalan Catalogue the only type of pants listed under lingerie are thongs or shape wear?   I have to say that it was very nice to be able to talk about these things with somebody who is not at all embarrassed, maybe even a little pleased to have someone to talk with herself.   After lunch it was still raining so we called it a day, I ran S home and then had to go to the bank to pay in some cheques, I was very tempted to go into Debenhams in Croydon to see if they had these, at that price they are a real bargain.   We found that they were on offer as S was reading through my bog and found this post.   I resisted!

Instead I went into West Wickham went to the bank, bought my new diary (I use a 14 month diary, much easier for work and music commitments) then I just had to go round the charity shops.   I bought a couple of cord work shirts, a belt bag for my mobile phone etc. a jewelry roll (could be useful) and some clip on earrings.   I resisted buying, or indeed even trying on some killer heels, the Sense shop has two pairs in my size both with heels which must be 4 inches or more, one in black with off white piping and the other silver strappy sandals!   If those sandals are still there next week I don't know if I will be able to resist, after all the party season is about to start!

Old Bras

I just half heard a news item on the radio about the finding of some medieval bras, remarkable since it was previously thought that bras were a 19th Century invention.    Although all of the academic fashion world seems surprised, when you think about it it makes sense.   Read more about the story here 

When I first heard this I thought to myself, well I think my wife has some in her chest of draws that old, looking at the picture I think she has some in similar condition as well.   For some strange reason she will wait until her bras are absolutely falling to pieces, and have turned grey (what ever colour they started out as) before she will even contemplate replacement.   When she does replace a worn out bra the new one is usually exactly the same as the old one, and always from the "functional" end of the range.   On the other hand I have to resist the temptation to buy more and more bras, I already have more than she does, but then mine are from the more frivolous end of the spectrum.   Maybe this is the difference between lingerie and underwear.

Solid Foundations

My latest purchase

Well the spray on elastoplast didn't work out too well, it certainly helped position the pads and held them for a while, but not very securely, I shall just have to work with what I have available.   I will admit that at least part of my experimentation is inspired by my latest purchase.   I bought this on e-bay, and have yet to try it on as it has been delivered to my friend P's house.   But I am aware that it should be worn with stockings and so there will be little security for my hip and thigh pads, and I am not at all sure how much security it will offer for my breast forms.

I try to tell myself that I bought this to help present a more womanly profile, but lets be honest I bought it because it looks like fun!   I love a bit of flummery and here we have lace, bows, ribbon, everything that is not needed but adds to the joy of getting dressed.   Given that I don't actually need foundation garments of any type, if I choose to wear them then there is no reason why they should be from the "practical" end of the spectrum.   Even if it ends up being just another bit of cheap tat from e-bay I shall still have had my money's worth with the joy of anticipation.   I spoke with P today on the phone so I know it has arrived, but rather than make a date to go down and see her, we have left it up to the weather.   When there is a day of rain and I can't work I shall take a little trip involving lunch and the collection of my parcel.   For once I am actually hoping for rain.

This Saturday my support group meets and if at all practical it would be nice to wear my new foundations.   I don't yet know what else I shall be wearing, again to a great extent that depends on the weather, and the venue.   We are now meeting in a local pub, the staff and other customers have so far been quite friendly and welcoming, so I wouldn't want to be the one going so far OTT as to put them off, so the cocktail dresses will be staying in their case for a while, it's just that I find I don't have much between relatively boring jeans, too formal suits and dresses and the posh frocks.   I need to be creative with what I have rather than go out and spend more money.   If everything works out well, I will be able to ask P for some advice before I go out on Saturday.   Evil thought just crossed my mind, would this be too much for my next osteopaths appointment?

A little shopping trip, with radio acompanyment

I don't know what is happening at radio four these days.   I listen most days at the very least when I first get up in the morning and as I am driving around.  

A couple of items caught my attention, and I thought might be worth sharing with you here , the first was from a partially heard clip from The Archers, one of the characters is trying to get up a ladies cricket team, but falling short of players, so some men are to made "Honorary Ladies" ~ where do I sign up.   On Woman's Hour earlier today during a discussion on "50 shades of grey" one of the contributors said that in the 60s she "burnt her bra to get equality with men" well, I thought, I bought my bra to gain equality with women.

And on that thought I bought yet another one today, since I bought some proper breast forms I have spent far too much time and money on bras, items I had barely considered before.   Now I find that I have far more than I could ever justify, indeed I have many more than my wife, and she needs them!

As some sort of justification I did buy some matching knickers, and I tell myself that I bought the cardigan (I had been after a nice white cardie for a while since it doesn't look as though we are going to have a summer) and the undies were free with my Matalan cardholder discount.  This months special offer was spend £30 and £10 off, so I bough these undies, a couple of belts and a nice soft white cardigan all for £20 ~ not bad.

I think this cardigan will go very well with quite a few of my dresses, particularly my new pink linen, and my white spotted black cotton.

Can I choose both?

I meant to share this a couple of days ago when it came out, still better late than never...

She is trying to find out if her fiance is gay, but this pretty much sums up the eternal conflict of being a cross dresser

Turner

So after (a very nice) lunch, I finally made it to my destination, the reason for my day off / out the Turner Inspired Exhibition, the exhibition was fascinating and gave me some fresh insights into the work of this very important and popular artist.  

Turner, Caernarvon Castle

Just about all of the people I have spoken about the exhibition to have know and loved some of Turners works, (The Fighting Temeraire, etc.) but have not even heard of Claude.    Known simply as Claude or Claude Lorraine after the area he was born in, Claude became one of the most influential landscape artists of his generation, and was certainly a major influence on Turner, and therefore on the impressionists.   It is a shame that he is not better known as his paintings are well worth a viewing

Claude, The Enchanted Castle

I would strongly invite you to follow the links to learn a little more about the man and his work, that is of course if you like this sort of thing.

After the exhibition I decided that I would walk up Regents Street to see what I could see, once I got as far as Oxford Street I felt obliged to look in a few stores.   I fancy a three peace lingerie set, that is matching bra, panties and suspender.   I want something pretty, not bridal white or ivory, nor sexy black, just pretty.   Now I understand that a lot of girls don't seem to like wearing stockings, well I understand that they don't I don't understand why, but that's another story.   What I don't understand is that in about half a dozen major Oxford Street stores I couldn't find anything that fitted the bill.  I want to be able to wear stockings, particularly over the summer months, but the two suspender belts I have are both "going home", one has a split in the fabric, the other has a broken fastener, and as I have mentioned before I simply don't trust "stay ups" because they don't.

While I was still at the National Gallery I was beginning to regret my choice in footwear by now my feet were killing me!   I paused for a coffee as much for the chance t sit down as for the coffee, so just to give me an excuse to sit down a little longer I had a slice of carrot cake with it.

Bras and coffee

As I write this I am sitting in Costa Coffee shop in Hayes using the old laptop, generally when I am out I like to not make myself any more conspicuous than I need to.   That is not anymore conspicuous than any other 5’ 10” woman with 3 inch heels would be.   Add to that I’m not the only woman here in a dress!   There are quite a few people here, enough to make it hard to find a table free, some sheltering from the continuing rain, some on their way home from picking children up from school, and some just having a break from the day with a coffee, there is one other laptop out, but he got a better table than me.   So you can tell it’s fairly busy, of course that means that they have the most inexperienced member of staff on the till, first I got given a carry out instead of the rather nice tall glass cup I like my latte in, ten in place of that they managed to give me a double espresso, twice I had to complain before they got it right, and the manager brought my latte over to where I was sitting and apologised, so much for being inconspicuous.

The only reason I can be out as Paula at all is that rain people are sheltering from, it may make things a bit miserable for some people, but it means no outdoors work for me today, every job I had booked involved cutting grass or sawing wood, two of the things that just can’t be done properly in the rain.   Once I realised that the rain was in for the day my plan, was to get changed after meeting some friends for lunch, get out and maybe do a bit of admin work in a coffee bar, which is just what I am currently pretending to do, while really typing up this for Paula’s Place.   I’m not sure how long I will stay here as I also have a couple of cheques to pay in, and if I have the time to get to a larger shopping centre I do want to look at some lingerie sets, I definitely fancy getting matching bra, panties and suspender belt, something I have never had.

It’s now early Tuesday morning, I have returned for a rehearsal and am just updating todays post.   After finishing my coffee I decided I just had time to pop into Bromley and inspect a few shops.   First I visited BHS, there I encountered an assistant proudly wearing a sash announcing “ask me about our bra fitting service” or something like that ~ so I did.   I was taken into a changing room to be measured, by two assistants, at first I wondered if they were flocking together for protection but it soon became clear that the first assistant was in training and needed the help (not the protection) of the other.   They measured me while I still had on my dress and told me that I was a 38 or 40 C or DD, I though hum, and went to look at their selection which was rather limited in that sort of size.   I then crossed the road to good old Marks and Sparks, here the range was intimidating but I saw nothing that I had to have.   Part of the problem is that I have rather set my heart on a set and I would prefer black, or at least dark and the only three peace sets seem to be aimed at brides, not their mothers.

After Marks I went to Debenhams, once again I was taken into a changing room to be measured, but this tie I was invited to strip down to my slip before being measured, here they reckoned I was a 38 DD or E!   I did try a couple of 38 DDs but did not feel that I quite “filled the bill”, by this time they were about to close so I left without trying any more.   Primark were still open for another hour so I popped in there and checked out their selection.   Of their sets it seems that the Bras I like either do not come in a size that I could even consider or were accompanied by panties that were highly inappropriate.   All in all a rather entertaining if unproductive afternoon ~ still I’m not complaining.   The staff at Debenhams were very friendly and help full and suggested that I go back when both they and I have more time, late night opening on Thursday looks favorite at the moment.

New Boobs, and trellis

Once her friend had gone P gave me the parcel that had arrived for me and left me while she got ready for lunch.   The parcel was the new boobs I had ordered, at first glance they do look very odd, once I had popped them into my bra they began to feel comfortable, the first definite impression was far more weight, and perhaps a little bit more "jiggle", we then went straight off to lunch.

So it was P's turn to buy lunch (this is a good way of making sure we carry on doing this, taking it in turns to pay) and we went back to the same Italian restaurant we used before, P is beginning to know Paula better, so when we were greeted with a 2ood afternoon Ladies" she whispered to me not to smile too much!   As with the last time we met up we talked and talked, about all sorts of things, families, gardens and only touched on T issues in passing.   We did talk about my bra problem though, and P decided that I did need help!   I can't get over how much fun being a lady who lunches can be, the attention of the staff, and one or two of the other customers, the relaxed friendly environment and some nice food in good company, who could want for more.

After lunch once again a quick (ish) visit to Matalan, since they are just round he corner to the restaurant I have tended to park there, and walk to lunch.   After that it seems only polite to go in and look around.   ow today we had a particular problem to solve, my bras.   P spotted that there was no point in getting me what she referred to as "practical" bras, but also that there was no point in spending too much and then finding that they don't fit.   Even somewhere like Matalan the selection is intimidating, in the end we decided to go for a compromise and bought a pack of two, one pink one white in 38C, that is a size up on what I have been wearing, but with no built in extra padding.   Almost as soon as we got back to P's I had to try at least one of them, and have to vote the purchase a success.   Now I know my size I can get myself a nice black set.   After all my losses that would give me bras in White (1); Pink (2); Zebra Print (1) and Black (1), that should be enough ~ unless I see something I really like of course.

While there I also tried this dress on again, P and the girl at the changing room both said it was nice, I should like to buy it but am just aware of how many clothes I am buying and how little chance I have to wear them.   Although the more I think about it the more I think I will buy it, what do you think?                                                                                    Well, after all that excitement we went back to P's house, I had been to the timber merchant earlier in the morning to pick up some lengths of timber and some trellis for her.   Her husband or step sons are quite happy to put it up but needed the prod of it being there.   First we took in the lengths of 2 x 2 then came back for the trellis, as we were getting it out a council workman who was doing a bit of work on the road called out to us ~ you girls alright or can I give you hand. without looking at me P replied that we were OK, then just told me to stop smirking!   This silly little event has given me a real "glow" and each time I think of I have a little smirk to myself.

Looking forward, down, and to the side

I have been having a bit of a rough time recently as I type this on Wednesday morning my Van is at the garage having it's MOT done, I am sure that it will not pass straight off, it's just a question of how badly it will fail and how much it will cost me.   This is of course all expense I could well do without having just paid out for my daughter to go on a trip to Italy, new glasses for me, repairs on the van and on my wife's car.   It is not just the money but also the inconvenience, but at least I am forced to spend a couple of days in the office catching up on some of my paperwork.

I am slowly getting used to my new glasses although I have found that it is simply impossible to conduct the band wearing them, to look down at the score I need to look through the part that is for close work, but the score is too far away so out of focus, I can't bring the score closer as that would block the view of the musicians, I shall just have too use my old ones for concerts and rehearsals, unless the contacts work out.



Well that's the looking down and sideways but looking forward ~ I think I will have to do some shopping.   I have just heard from my GG friend P that a package has arrived for me, this will be my new boobs.   After my van was broken into I decided I would get some better / proper forms, I am of course looking forward to trying them out (on?).   Furthermore I am now a bit short on bras I seem to just have the two that I took to Cardiff with me, (so no black and white, the two basic essential colours,) and more to the point I simply don't know what size I am.   Up till now I have just bought the most padded ones I could find in a 38 inch band.   I know that in theory a lot of places will do a fitting, but I fear that they might be a bit out of my price range.   Then of course there are all the different types, not wired, under wired, balcony, full-cup, plunge, push up, tee shirt multi-way..... and that's before we start n the different materials cotton, lace, satin etc. etc. and then off course it might be nice to have to have matching sets and I like hi leg panties.

I think the best plan might be to wait until I get to see P next time and be guided by her experience.

Away

I've been away for a couple of days, and not had a chance to post for a while, however I have managed to prepare a few posts and will be putting those up over the next week.   They may seem a bit random at first, especially if I get them out of order, but I hope they will make some sort of sense.

Right now I have just got home after a long drive home, I made the drive a little longer than it needed to be so that I could stop for comfort breaks and simply to strut my stuff.   I have had a day when I have been dressed 100% fem 100% of the time, even if it wasn't always obvious.   I started the day in bed, waking up wearing my nice satin PJs a fairly boring dressing gown concealing the more obvious fem cues, after a shower I put on a rather lacy cami / vest a pale lilac polo, tights and some fem jeans.   The main thing that struck me was how comfortable I felt.   The way I looked was secondary but still quite gratifying.   I stayed dressed this way until about an hour before I had to leave, a which point I swapped the camisole for a bra and slip, this is my not quite matching nearly set of animal print undies, I was pleasantly surprised that with my polo neck back on it was not too obvious what I was wearing underneath, and again how comfortable it all was.

Once I had departed I swapped my jeans for skirt and changed shoes so I could get a couple of photos

Not very good I know but the best I could manage at the time.   I don't think I'm a bad photographer, but I am rubbish at self portraits, maybe I should practise more.   You may notice that I am wearing my own hair, this was partly down to comfort, partly down to it being rather blustery, my hair is a little on the long side at the moment and I reckoned I could "get away with it".   Interestingly when I made my first stop at a services I suddenly felt very self conscious without my wig, I almost went back to the van to put it on, but carried on.   I felt as though I stood out and that every one was looking at me with disapproval, of course they weren't, but it shows what thing threads our confidence can hang by.   After another comfort break I changed again into my new red dress ~ you will hear more of that soon ~ and completed the journey with only one more stop, before getting so nearly home that I felt safe stopping for a glass of wine.   Unfortunately the Grape and Grain was already closed when I got there, but another local hostelry welcomed Paula in for a solitary late night glass of wine.   Now I'm home and of course that means I had to change back into drab, once again I am feeling the low after the high, eve though I haven't really been anywhere or done anything it is so nice being dressed that going back into normal boring drab male dress is a real downer

Knickers to Panties

There was a post on a forum I'm a member of the other day where the member related a story which involved a stranger asking if he (he was in drab) was wearing panties.   It later became clear that she actually referred to women's pants or something like that.   My question is why is that on every CD or TV website I see (and I will confess to that being quite a few) female nether undergarments are always called panties, but everywhere else pants, knickers, slips, briefs, indeed pretty much anything except panties.

Maybe this is a transatlantic thing, but I suspect that pants is a gender neutral term, and that pantie is quite specifically feminine.   After all what man would wear something like these Janet Reger Red and black floral print satin brazilian briefs.

Given half a chance that is...........................................

How to look sexy

10 Top Tips here  there could be a proble with no.4, but don't over do no.10

The weekend sarted here

In order to get to Cardiff in reasonable time to be able to look around a bit before going to my Mothers I packed my over night bag on Friday night, got up early on Saturday, dressed and out of the house by 6:30 I had crossed town and was on the A4 before 7:00.   To those of you who don't know London this is a journey that if made a  couple of hours later would take between one and half, and two hours.   Of course I was travelling pretty (sorry just had to borrow this term from Kimberley at Travelling Transgendered) but not over the top.  I had on a pair of black slacks, a black roll neck, grey jacket and black pumps.   A bit more dressed up than the average white van driver on the Motorway, but not much.
What this meant was that I attracted very little attention, first when I stopped for a coffee, and then later as I did a bit of shopping.   First I went to Matalan I was not looking for anything specific, but did find a very nice blouse, white short puff sleeves, with black spots and a black satin tie around the waist.   this was on sale so I picked up a nice blouse for £4   Some of my fem clothes I can wear in male mode, but this will not be one of them.   Next stop Sainsbury's to pick up something for lunch, checking their sale items I found a ring I rather like so I picked that up for a massive, bank balance busting £1.   All this time no one seemed to pay any undue attention to the rather tall lady in high heels.

As all the clothes I was wearing except for the jacket do fall into the category of those that will pass as male I just slipped off my bra and changed jacket before going to Mum's.   As well as making life a lot easier, it also meant that when I had to go out again to do her shopping after lunch, it took very little time r effort to make sure I was "properly" dressed.   Once again no one in Tesco paid me any special attention, however I did have a couple of chats, one with another customer and with the cashier.   It was very nice not to be subject to any special attention, to just blend in.   I don't know if I passed, but I certainly blended.

Wardrobe Update

I have now had a bit of a chance to assess what got turned out from my wardrobe.   I haven't had a look in the bag currently lurking in my garage, but I have had a look through my draws (that is draws, not drawers) and go through the hanging space in my wardrobe.     The knicker draw that I referred to in an earlier post had my panties, bras tights and stockings in, they have all gone.   In my sock draw I have found a couple of pairs of knee highs (or trouser socks) in other draws a couple of skirts my roll necks and a pair of culottes escaped exile, curiously I seem to have retained a couple of pairs of plain cotton panties, while my men's silk briefs aren't there.

In the hanging section all the dresses and slips have gone, but my denim jacket, jeans, a formal jacket, a couple of pairs of trousers and a couple of skirts that were on the same hanger as my denim jacket all survived.   I should say that as far as I can tell at the moment everything has survived, just been put into exile.   The sword that I thought had fallen on my head remains suspended by a thread, but still suspended.

Next job is to find a better way to look after my wardrobe, out of the way but accessible, for the sake of domestic harmony I think I need to be more circumspect about  cross dressing activities; I also think that however reluctant my wife maybe about this we do need to talk, she is not good at talking, at any rate discussing, so I may have to force the issue, maybe even suggesting going to a councillor.

This all sounds a bit heavy, but I am so relieved that it is not as bad as I at first thought that I shall reward you all (and myself) with a picture!   This was taken back in June, I'm not sure if I have published it before, by the way the skirt and jumper I'm wearing were both still in my draws.