Paula's Place

Paula's Place

Friday 4 March 2022

Camera Whore

 Maybe not the title I am most proud of but one I acquired a few years back when my Orchestra took part in the BBC series the Great British Amateur Orchestra. It seemed as though every time a camera appeared it would be pointing at me! and this did not go unnoticed. More recently in my role as a trustee of Croydon Pride I have often been called upon to be a representative of "my community" and on occasion that has involved some photos. I think I have now been the model in at least four photo sessions.

Photo Credit Justin David 2013
I was recently reminded of the first ~ this was way back in the dim and distant past, before I was out, but after I had started playing with the LGSO I wrote a little about it both here and here; but I did not tell the whole tale, perhaps to protect my dignity and maintain some of the mystery.

We were asked to wear our idea of glamourous, this black evening dress fits the bill perfectly. What this photo doesn't show is one of the great features of the dress, it has a scooped backless design that runs into a very small train. Given that this was before I had even started my social transition, never mind anything else it presented certain, erm "structural" issues. Being backless I could not wear a conventional bra, not actually having any boobs I couldn't wear any other form of support. What I could do was attach my breast forms directly to my chest using a medical glue.

All went well until under the warmth of the lights I started to "glow" (Ladies glow, gentlemen perspire, horses sweat!) no problem nothing showed on my face, my makeup stayed just fine. Unfortunately the same couldn't be said for the so called "medical glue"! My left boob became detached and started to slowly descend down the inside of my dress. Poor Justin, the photographer, couldn't understand why I was so wooden, and at that time I was just too shy to tell him.

Later sessions didn't have the same issues I'm glad to say!

The next session was at home with my friend Vanessa Lees, I was part of a photo project she was running showing trans people just getting on with their real lives, rather than as subjects of glamour, desire or abuse.

Photo Credit Vanessa Lees Photography 2015

The Croydonist 2018
A few years after that I had a session for International Women's Day, we had a little outdoor exhibition of photos of women changing the face of Croydon, and this was my face. I rather like this photo, I definitely like the outfit, but I do remember that the photographer (sorry I can't remember their name to credit them) had terrible trouble with reflections from my glasses, so that's why they're on the end of my nose.

It was a very enjoyable experience and I was already so much more relaxed about the whole session than I had been just a few years earlier.

The latest one was just a few months later for Croydon Bid, the local traders association, an outdoor exhibition of local Croydon "Characters", I was alongside dancers, rock guitarists, actors etc. This time I was draping myself in the Pride flag rather than engaging with one of my instruments. I though this photo was just going to be a little thing up for maybe a month or two, it turned out to be larger than life size, and last time I checked it had been up for over two years.


Croydon Bid 2019






2 comments:

Connie said...

I wouldn't go so far as to say camera whore; more like an overexposure, I think. :-)

mark said...

very very AMAZING LADY ..is your music on youtube .any ware can listen too ,MARK.X