Paula's Place

Paula's Place

Tuesday, 5 February 2013

Bowing Out

Well I have my new(er) laptop back from the hospital, but that does not mean that all my problems are over, I have lost an awful lot of data, including a lot of my business accounts and the work I do for other businesses.   I have certainly learnt my lesson about back ups, a friend tells me that a lot of it may be retrievable, I shall just have to try.

This evening I left for my Brass band rehearsal unable to collect e-mails, of course this did not help my mood, which was pretty poor anyway knowing that I had to tell the guys that I was packing up as their conductor.   I know I am doing this for all the right reason, that they have been taking advantage of me, and that my marriage is much more important to me than the band; but I still can't help feeling as though I am letting them down.   I know that I will miss many aspects of conducting, especially I performance, when it goes well it is one of the most marvellous musical experiences it is possible to have.  On the other hand sometimes in rehearsal you feel as though you may as well not be there.

Anyway, I bit the bullet and told the guys my decision and although disappointed I think it was accepted, so that's my "homework" done for this week,no easy but now I have done it it is a bit of a weight off my shoulders, the whole thing had become more of a responsibility than I had ever wanted it to be.   I now have to be vigilant to make sure that I do not take on any more commitments.

This weekend I have tickets for a concert a friend is playing in, it is a good programme, not a bad orchestra and very good seats so that should be a nice outing for us; it also clashes with my support group's monthly meeting that means I won't have see any of them this year until March.   It is all about getting my priorities right.
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