I thought I would be writing about my wonderful adventure yesterday, going out dressed, but as it actually happens it was "no biggie". I feel I need to clarify, I often find I have a craving to get dressed, as I have evolved that has changed from just wearing panties, to other underwear, to dresses and skirts until over the last few years I have increasingly been going out fully dressed and made up, presenting as a woman, showing the world the woman that is part of me. However often I have done this it has still been an occasional treat so the clothes I have worn reflect this, they have been special, a nice dress maybe a trouser suit, but always something a bit dressy.
I have now crossed another bridge in my development, I have joined the LGSO and am attending rehearsals for our next concert, 1/ they only know Paula so I need to go to these rehearsals as Paula 2/ by the very nature of rehearsal these are (sartorially) relaxed affairs, most wearing jeans and tee shirts or sweaters. I need to fit in, at the last rehearsal I went to I was the only girl not wearing jeans! (I had on leggings and a tunic). So when I planned what to wear this week I decided on skinny jeans and a nice long red jumper with ankle boots, still quite obviously girl clothes but not too dressy. Now normally in the build up to going out I get a bit excited, I anticipate the pleasure as I plan my outfit, as I think about what jewelry I will wear, what lipstick will match my top, all that stuff that is not a normal everyday concern. This time I was not subject to any strong urge to dress, but I knew I had to, my anticipation was more about the rehearsal. This may be partly down to it being a commitment, and partly down to fact that I have a number of other concerns at the moment.
So I got changed put on my face and went to the rehearsal, once again I had planned to go by public transport but was running a bit late so ended up driving. It was an enjoyable rehearsal, we made some positive progress with the symphony, Shostakovich 5, one I have not played before, and then went home. I seem to be accepted by the other members of the orchestra and they are happy as long as I can play my part. The only other member I talked with much was the tuba player (we sit next to each other) who I found lives near me, so I gave him a lift home, and we have a few friends and experiences in common.
In all it was a nice afternoon / evening I found I was comfortable and confident in company I didn't know, and was just doing what I do, it's just that this time it was Paula doing it.
I am looking forward to the performance, and am enjoying planning what I will wear, I shall however have to be careful of my backstage preparations,