Paula's Place

Paula's Place

Saturday, 21 July 2012

Questions, questions....

Joey asked a couple of questions,

1. Why did you decide to start a blog?
Well I started to Blog quite a while back, I suspect that my original attempt was a bit of self publicity.   I vaguely thought that it might be a way I could get myself and my work a bit better known, at the time I still harboured delusions of competence as a professional musician as well as the gardening business just beginning.   Interestingly that Blog never really took off, it is still going but I only post maybe once a week, and just about no body reads it.   Paula's Place is different, I started this blog because I needed to talk about this aspect of my life.   At the time I had nobody I could talk to directly about this bazaar drive to wear women's clothes, I had started reading the excellent Stana and Meg Blogs, and decided that this was a good way of exploring who, and what Paula is.   Initially I think this was all I was interested in but once I had started to write, and found that there are people who read what I write, I think I also found a form of validation for this side of me.   I suppose that this is in some linked with desire we all have to be loved, or at the very least to be found interesting.
It is very much through writing the blog that I have come to terms with the idea that cross dressing is something I am rather than something I do, that it will not go away, and that therefore I should accept myself, and try to be the best I can.   In the time I have been writing Paula's Place I have come to realise that if as I believe Paula is a complete rounded three dimensional person then I should be writing about all aspects of life not just dressing up.   So now I find I am as likely to be writing about a concert I played in or a garden I have been working in as I am about the dress I want to be able to wear when I next go out.

So although my intention was simply to explore one aspect of my life, I have ended up not just charting progress in that area, but providing  a commentary on my life and observations in general.

2. What do you find is the hardest aspect of blogging?
I am very tempted to just say take a look at yesterday's post!
Sometimes, well quite often actually, I get home from work and I am either dog tired, or I have to dash out to a meeting or a rehearsal.   It is very easy to just not bother with an entry, but I have found that Paula's Place isn't just for Paula, she is part of a whole community, of regular readers, some who lie to comment some who are "regulars at the Bar" and some who just drop in anonymously.   I feel if I don't have something fresh then I am letting everyone down.   So yes sometimes I just don't feel like writing but make myself.
I don't know how obvious those posts are, I hope not too obvious. I am trying to build up a stock of draft posts on stand by for when I feel really tired, but whenever I get a couple in the bag, they soon get used.   I would have thought that the public baring of my soul would be hard, but then I am sort of anonymous, I would have thought that mentioning things that would make it quite easy to identify me would have been hard, but then why would anyone reading this blog want to be malicious towards me?   I would have thought that keep finding things to write about would be hard, but there always seems to be something worthy of comment, so for me the hardest thing is the commitment and energy levels.
I will be really interested to see what Joey himself has to say in answer to his own questions.
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