Confused?

I often hear people talk about gender confusion, indeed I often refer to my own gender confusion.   Over the years being physically male and enjoying many activities that were considered to be masculine ~ although such things as playing Rugby and Powerlifting are now considered to be just as open to women as men it was not the case in day.   Indeed even my choice of instrument was considered to be male when I was learning, it would have been hard to anticipate the experience I had last week of seeing a top notch Professional American Orchestra with a young lady playing a large tuba (from my distance it looked like a 6/4 Conn BBb)

Of course there was also the sex thing ~ for most young men most of life seems to be largely about sex ~ and that just added to my confusion, after all I fancied women so why would I want to be one?   It is only now that I have "matured" that I am much less confused, and indeed as I am now six months into living full time female it just feels natural.   On the other hand I have a couple of friends who assert that they have never been confused, they have always known that their minds and bodies did not coincide.   There is a bit of me that envies their certainty, there is another part that does not envy their situation.    They were both born too early, at a time when transition simply did not seem to be available to most us.

What prompts all this mussing is that the other day one of my friends and customers hit a whole new level of gender based speech confusion, his small dog was barking at me (simply doing his job!) so my friend said to his dog

"Come on now, you know uncle Paula"