Wednesday, 30 January 2013
Sometimes it is good to see yourselves through the eyes of others, it quickly became apparent that our problem is that we are simply not functioning as a couple or indeed as a family. Other things, other people take too much time and emotional energy so there is not enough of either left over for the marriage. I have committed to giving up some of my activities in order to spend more time with my wife, I think this is a good thing. However it will not be easy.
I plan to give up working with the Brass Band, I had originally only committed to a couple of months while they looked for a "proper" conductor, that was over two years ago. I often find I am the only one who attends every rehearsal, and although it has been musically very challenging I have now decided that other things are more important. It will be difficult for me telling them that. I am very bad at saying no, I do not like confrontations, I do not like the feeling that I a letting people down, and I hate rejection, all of these factors make me fear the conversation, and the longer I put it off the worse it will be. We have a concert on Thursday so I think at that point I will warn a couple of the "senior" members of my decision and then confirm it at Monday night's rehearsal.
Although sometimes I do wish my wife and daughter would put down their smart phones and actually talk, the cartoons are simply cartoons that came up from a simple Google search, and that made me smile.