Rejected! but not defeated

As a general rule I hate cancellations, I make my plans and work out how I am going to get everything done, then a cancellation throws everything out.   This last weekend though, it may have been just as well that Saturday evening's Gig got cancelled as four gigs and a full orchestra rehearsal may have been a bit too much.

I have delayed writing about this cancellation as I have been trying to work out exactly how I feel about it.   By way of explanation, my little jazz band (Cross the Line) were to play at the birthday party of a member of my old Church, this is the same Church that all the other members of the band still active members of.   Apparently it was only a couple of days when the lady who's birthday it was realised that I was a member of the band and didn't want me at her party.

This is pretty much the first time I have been subject to this type of discrimination and initially I was hurt.   On reflection I accept that this sort of thing will happen, especially from this type of person (African conservative evangelical) and I rejoice that so far this has been so rare.   While on a personal level I had mixed views as I was also glad too have a moment over the weekend to myself to relax a bit.   I think what upsets me most is the position it put the rest of the band in

Cross the Line in action

I often observe just how busy my musical life is, within the last seven days I have played with five different ensembles, each one with it's own distinctly different character, for the other members of Cross the Line that band is their only secular musical outlet, so to lose a gig is to lose maybe a fifth of their annual performance opportunities.   We discussed the situation and I encouraged them to go ahead and play without me, to their credit they were all reluctant on a moral stand, not wanting to tacitly affirm the prejudice and discrimination, but wanted to play.

I felt it was difficult for me to give my blessing but I did give my permission and was glad that they played well and enjoyed the performance ~ I just hope and pray that none of us are put in this position again.   I now want to find a really rocking gig for the band to make up for this, something where we can turn the amps up a bit and enjoy ourselves.