Woman's Hour

Woman's Hour is a BBC Radio magazine show, I often listen while I am working and there was an item that got my attention today.   The question was asked How much of the truth about yourself should you tell your partner?   They really had in mind past relationships, or exploits, but this got my attention because I did not tell my wife about my cross dressing, instead she found out and our relationship has not been the same since.   I do not know if she would still have married me if she had known before hand, but at least I would not have been lying.   I think that in many ways it was the lying that hurt her most.

Anyway I felt I should respond to the show, this is the e-mail I have sent them, as Paula.

"I did not hear all of this item, but I did hear a couple of views that not telling your partner the whole truth could be a good idea.   I am a 53 year old male to female cross dresser, I have also been married for nearly 20 years.   I did not tell my wife about my cross dressing until a couple of years ago.   When she found out she was devastated that I could keep something like this from her, the lie of omission being as bad as the act of commission.   Our relationship has been permanently marred by my not telling the whole truth at the beginning of our relationship.   We are still married, and generally happy, but there is always that cloud somewhere in the background"

It will be interesting to see if I get a response