Paula's Place

Paula's Place

Tuesday, 13 September 2016

Done in!

Ingmar Bergman famously said "I usually say I left Puberty at 58" I'm a little different, I seem to be starting it (again) at 58!

As somebody who is constantly complaining about being too busy  I was interested to start listening to a short series of radio programs on the subject. Good old BBC Radio 4 is doing a week long piece by Oliver Blakeman, Have a listen here!  A lot of his premise seems to be that being too busy is the result of our own choices, often bad choices.   One comment that leapt out at me was the one that opines when we are too busy we make poor decisions which often result in us getting even more busy.   I have certainly been guilty of this over the last year.

However I am increasingly suspecting that it is not that I am too busy as much as that I'm too weary.   I have not had a planned break since October 2014 and I find that it is increasingly difficult to get going in the morning, as well as not being able to keep going with as much enthusiasm in the evenings. I am feeling rather run down, tired and a generally a bit done in.    I know it has been a long summer, I know it is a long time since I had a proper break, I know I have missed out on a lot of weekends this year, one way and another, yet I still can't help feeling as though I should have a bit more zip than I can muster at the moment.

This all forces me to wonder if maybe there is another factor.   It has definitely been worse since I started on hormone therapy, but if this is a side effect I am sufficiently happy with the other developments that I will learn to put up with it.   Of course there is also always the whole possibility that once my system gets used to it I will settle down to usual levels of lethargy.

It's rather odd going through puberty at 58